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Monday, June 21, 2010

Things You Ponder on I-81

Pin It I was headed to Tennessee, enjoying the plush leather solitude of my rented Buick Enclave with its uber-quiet interior, enhanced as it was by the plug-in for my IPod and minus the sounds of any bickering offspring (bless their hearts). Suddenly an errant thought hit me, and I picked up my cell phone to call my husband.

"Has the mama bird come home yet?" I asked him.


I could understand his confusion--after all, that's how I had initiated the conversation--exactly as the thought had struck my mind. No social "hey, how are yous, what are you doing, blah blah blahs." Just right to the point. I repeated myself, not seeing the value in lengthy explanations. He'd get it eventually. "Has the mama bird come back to her nest?"

"What are you talking about?" Or maybe he wouldn't.

"The. Mama. Bird. The nest on our porch. You know. Whenever we've walked outside today, the baby birds have hollered something fierce because they're hungry. I haven't seen Mama Bird all day long. I was just wondering if she had come back."

"How would I know?" I expelled a breath of exasperation.

"You're supposed to know these things! You're, like, the king of all things Nature, husband."

"Well, no, I don't know if the mama bird is there or not."

I waited politely, as in: could you go check out the situation, please, but he sort of missed his nonverbal cue because there was just a long pause on the line. And then, impatiently, "Are we done?"

"Well, no! I thought if she wasn't there, you could take the whole planter thing out in the middle of that shady spot in the yard where I have the bird feeders and set it there and maybe some other birds would hear the baby birds hollering and would adopt them. Sort of. You know."

Long pause. "You're kidding, right?"

Okay. So I know it's a bit on the naive side. But stranger things have happened and I can't just let them DIE!!! (for hyperbole's sake). They're babies. It's pitiful. "Well...no. It could happen. I think I've seen something like it somewhere...in National Geographic or something...." I trailed off.

Duane laughed. At me, not with me. It's a cruel world when your better half laughs at you, people. "Uh, yeah. That's not happening. I'm already halfway to Richmond."

I sat in silence for a minute, pondering. Then Duane spoke again. "Is this seriously the crap you think about while you're driving down the road?" I stared at the traffic flashing by on the opposite side of the highway, at the pines that lined the road at intermittent intervals, at the license plate of the car in front of me that had been bugging me for the last three miles.

Seriously? "Well, yeah." Isn't this the kind of thing everyone thinks about?


Chrissy said...

Hey, as they say " men are from mars...".I know exactly how u feel and yes, I would of thought the same as u did... I do know my husband would of made sure the babies were out of the nest or moved the nest- tho I didn't know u could do that...I think it also depends on whether your husband had that nest in his head as a priority... I've learned that when it comes to matters that are at a concerned priority w/me, I usually deal w/it and not think that the other person would be/think the same as I do... I've had too many instances where I should of taken care of something to find out that the other person hadn't thought of it.

YogaSavy said...

I like the comment from Chrissy "men are from mars"
Mine is truly from mars and add a few more to it!

PMC said...

okay, that is just hilarious.

i saved some birds once. my father-in-law was headed out with his gun because these birds kept nesting over his porch and making a mess of things. i stopped him and told him i would give it one more try with the hose. i must have the magic touch. those birds didn't come back.


he laughed at me too.

men. :)

Sue said...

Love it.


Richard & Natalie said...

Men are from Mars... Bless their hearts. ;) We recieved a copy of that book for our wedding. I never read it. Maybe that's my problem.

But now I have to know...Did the momma bird come back? Tell your hubby now even people in Utah are worrying about those babies. :)

Lori said...

Chrissy--Mars! For sure! That is it, in a nutshell. His priorities are just totally different. If I hadn't been en route to a different state, I would've just taken care of it myself, and avoided the whole laughter thing. ;)

YS--she hit it, didn't she?

Misty--I have finally managed to stop him from removing the nests that these little house wrens make each year...that's progress, right? He merely shakes his head in and wonders why I bother to buy the really pretty, really expensive flowers anymore...


Natalie--I don't KNOW!!! I won't know until I get home tomorrow and find out if those poor little birdies are alive or dead. It's so terrible. Or it might not be. I could be making a mountain out of nothing. I guess we'll find out...

Anaise said...

Hmmm, I don't drive anywhere alone, so the things I think about are how to keep the peace in the back seat(s).

If I were alone, I might think about baby birds . . . or nothing at all.

I hope they're all right.

Lori said...

Anaise--I hear ya--all too loud and clear! That ride was a pleasant and not too frequent occurrence. :)

And fyi, everyone...not to be a downer, but when I arrived home, the nest had two holes in it...one at the backside, and the original. No babies. Duane thinks a snake might have had itself a snack, unfortunately. :(

Richard & Natalie said...


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