Pin It According to my husband, I have the life of Riley.
I'm not really sure who Riley is, but he (or she) stays home and does whatever the heck he (or she) wants to do, whenever the heck he (or she) wants to do it. And writes blog posts in between.
Now, I could lie and tell you that this was said very gently, as to not hurt my feelings, but you may recall that we have been married for fifteen years. There's a certain syllogism there that many of you may be familiar with. Where there is marriage, there is discord. Where there is fifteen years of marriage, there is voluble discord.
So I have the life of Riley. I get to get up past the bootie crack of dawn, I get to work out, I get to take lunch whenever I want, I get to watch Tivo'd television, play on the computer, and...there was something else. Oh, yeah--take a nap if I want to take a nap. AS IF.
All of this was to say, simply, would I please just put his underwear in his drawer while I am busy having my life of Riley. I have no problem with that, really. It's just that...dang. Laundry is just so futile. You wear it, toss it in the hamper, sort it, wash it, dry it, fold it, sort it, and store it neatly in the correct drawer, and within a day or two, it's right back in the hamper. I mean, really. What's the point? Why can't you just pick it up off the floor from it's neatly folded stack?
It's kind of like making the bed. What is the point of making the bed in the morning, anyway? You're just going to un-make it and mess it all up around twelve hours later.
I don't think I really have the life of Riley, though. Staying home is tougher than people think. Cleaning toilets...total ick. And working out: I tried it once and I was sore for three days. I don't think I'm cut out for it.* And then, you have to be super-organized and remember things like when the kids' lunch accounts are about to run out, and which days the one has soccer practice and the other has tumbling, and which days you're supposed to carpool with Cici, and then there are Truly Terrible Things like cleaning monsters from the refrigerator...
All he ever sees, though, is me in a puddle at the end of the day. Maybe I should save all of the hard labor for the four-o'clock hour?
*And actually, I'm totally teasing. An awesome, quick workout is Jillian Michaels' 20-minute, 30-Day Shred. She'll kick your butt for around 4 days, but then you'll get into a good groove and stop feeling like you're going to die and start feeling like you may possibly make it.