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Wednesday, October 6, 2010

In The Clouds

Pin It I have had a lifelong love of gazing at clouds, watching as they drift lazily past then gather in beautiful formations or discovering shapes and stories in their changing forms.

This began as a young child in Clinton, Iowa where I learned to watch for the fast-moving, greenish-gray clouds which usually foreshadowed a city-wide tornado warning. This fascination continued as my family moved to southern California and my younger brother and I would climb onto the roof of our apartment building to watch the bright golden-red sunsets behind the cotton ball clouds which hovered over the ocean. After moving to Utah and falling in love with the mountains I have observed the clouds that tend to linger at the tops of the majestic peaks.

Simply put, I love clouds.

I have realized over years worth of observation and fascination that the clouds could be considered something of a metaphor for my life.

Sometimes I feel as though I am stretched much too thin, like cotton batting clouds, pulled so tightly in so many directions that holes begin to show through.

Other days, like the clouds I see so often clinging to the tops of mountains, I just need something to hold on to, whether it be my family, my faith, my memories or any other thing that can sustain me until I am ready to stand on my own again.

Some of my best days are the ones where I am like the clouds which are filled with light. I feel ready to conquer the world - or at least the various tasks associated with being a wife and mother and human being - with a bright and happy countenance, filled with hope and possibility.

There are also times when I feel like a storm cloud, dark and angry and ready to burst. I reach a point where I am filled to capacity... and then, when I can no longer carry the burden or hold another drop of emotion, the tears fall like rain until I am empty.

It seems that as I have passed through each learning phase of my life, I have been like a cloud formation - changing slowly, almost imperceptibly, into different shapes and forms depending on which way the wind was blowing. It often happens so slowly that before you know it I have become a person who is completely different than I was to begin with.

However, no matter the state I'm in, there is usually a silver lining if I'm just willing to find it.

And just as I am mesmerized by watching the clouds and the way they change and morph depending on the atmosphere around them, I enjoy watching people as they do the same. No two are alike - each is unique in its color and form and structure, and that is what makes each one fascinating.


Janet said...

I LOVE clouds, too. In fact I'm often found saying "it's a good cloud day." To which my daughter replies, "Mom, you always say that!" Thanks for letting me think of them in different way.

Lori said...

Lovely, Gerb. I'll think of this each time I gaze at the clouds.

Kara said...

The other day the clouds were lingering by Mt. Timpangos. They top of the clouds appeared to be an exact replica of the "lady outline".

Gina said...

I love you. I love clouds. I love this analogy. I love your writing. You are great. Fun to read.

Teachinfourth said...

I'm a little black raincloud…

I love the analogy, too.

I can think of one more reason we're friends.

Gerb said...

Janet- Almost every day in Utah is a good cloud day, isn't it? I LOVE it!

Lori- As a kid I used to wonder if clouds had feelings like we do. That's kind of where it all started.

Kara- That sounds awesome. Those clouds sound like they were clinging to every curve!

Gina- I love when you leave me comments. I love how you make me feel awesome.

T5th- I think in analogies way too often... but if it counts as another reason we're friends then it must be a good thing!

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